pen paling – why and how to start

You are enjoying writing letters and being creative and would like to build connections with people from all around the world?
Then you should start pen paling!

I had lots of wonderful pen pals from all around the world from 2019 until I started my travels in 2022.
I loved learning about new cultures, finding new friends, and being creative.

These the reasons you should start pen paling now!

  1. You get to learn about different cultures

I had pen pals from Germany and all around the world.
We wrote about our Christmas and Easter traditions, the climate in our country and what people are like in our area.
It is so interesting to see how every country is different and has it’s own culture.
Through pen paling, you learn nearly as much about other places as when traveling there and it’s cheaper!

  1. You get to have friends from all over the world

We also wrote about our personal lives, so you really felt like they were a close friend.
I was able to meet one of my pen pals on my travels in Australia and it was strange knowing a lot about that person but actually meeting her for the first time, but we had a great time together.
She was the sweetest person ever and showed me around her city.
I love being able to meet friends when traveling and getting to know them even more and learning more about their culture and being shown around the area by a local and doing the same for them when they visit you.

It is totally normal though that pen paling doesn’t work out with everybody.
Especially when I started, I changed pen pals a lot because some didn’t answer my letters or it took them half a year and I wanted to be able to keep track of my active letter exchanges.
It was fine that we didn’t continue writing letters.
If there was a good connection we were still able to write emails instead or stay in contact on social media.
I usually had around 8 to 10 active pen pals.
You should know that letters to countries far away can take some time to deliver, so it wasn’t like I got a letter every day.

  1. You get to be creative

I always admired people who did bullet journaling, but I didn’t have time to do it every day and I knew I would barely look at it again in the future.
When writing letters I was able to get creative decorating envelopes, letters, and notes I added.
Even if you think you don’t have enough stationary you can keep it simple, use colorful pens, self-pressed flowers, or colored paper and I always exchanged stickers, washi tape samples, and sticky note samples with my pen pals I could reuse to decorate my letters.
You don’t even have to decorate your letters if that is not what you like.
Pen paling is about building a connection to a stranger and enjoying writing with them.

  1. You get excited over every letter you receive

For me it got up to the point where I was addicted to checking our mailbox and every time I got a letter it was like a little present.
I loved hearing from my friends, seeing what they created and now being able to spend time creating a letter myself.

  1. You get to try and see things from different countries

We exchanged things like tea bags, recipes, playlists and sometimes flat candy and coins.
It was interesting to try tea and candy from all over the world, try out their recipes and seeing coins from different countries.
You are able to dive deeper into their culture without being there and I love that!

Now that I hopefully convinced you to start pen paling I should let you know how to actually start it.

  1. Find pen pals on Instagram

I found all my pen pals through Instagram.
There are hashtags like

#penpalswanted #penpalsearch #penpalneeded

Through those hashtags you can get to the pages posting about people looking for pen pals or you can send them some info about yourself they can post.
I personally created a separate Instagram account for pen paling because I didn’t want all those people to see my personal pictures immediately and after some time writing with them I gave them my personal account so that they know who they are writing with.
I was also able to post my letters on there.

  1. Find pen pals through websites

You can also find pen pals through websites.
I have never tried that though because Instagram has always worked really well for me.

https://www.globalpenfriends.com
https://www.penpalworld.com
https://www.penpal.me

Some of those websites are a bit different that usual pen paling because they are sending the online personalized postcard for you.
I think you just have to find out if you are more comfortable with posting a picture and stuff about you on a website or write people that are looking for pen pals on Instagram.

  1. Get to know them a bit

Before writing the first letter you should get to know them a bit.
Exchange things like age, interests and just text a bit before giving out your address.
If you want you can already exchange personal Instagram to see what they look like but you don’t have to.
For some of my pen pals I didn’t know what they looked like for a long time but we still connected really well.

  1. Exchange addresses when you feel like they are legit

Pen paling might seem a bit unsafe because you are giving a stranger your address.
So be sure they are legit before giving it to them and ask your parents for permission if you are underage.
If you have a post box give them the address to that instead.
One of my pen pals asked me to send them a picture holding a fork over my head to see if I am really who I tell her I am.
I think this is a fun and easy way to see if that person is who they tell you they are.
Think of anything crazy but easy someone can send you a picture of themselves with that a creep will not find a picture of online.

  1. Agree on one person writing the first letter

When you exchanged addresses and feel comfortable with that person agree on one of you writing the first letter.
Include general information about yourself in your first letter you might want to know about them too.

Before writing your first letter you should inform yourself about the sizes of letters, the allowed weight, and the costs of stamps in your country to avoid any problems with your letter at the post office.

Now that you have a guide on how to start pen paling there is no more reason you shouldn’t do it if you think that is something you could enjoy.
Give it a try and start with one person at a time.
And remember to stay safe out there!